4 THINGS THAT A MAN MUST HAVE BEFORE YOU MARRY HIM

THE YEAR OF REDEEMING TIME

2Cor.6.14 Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers [do not make mismated alliances with them or come under a different yoke with them, inconsistent with your faith]. For what partnership have right living and right standing with God with iniquity and lawlessness? Or how can light have fellowship with darkness? (AMP)

My Elder Brother/sister, should I educate you please?

Adapted_from;

Apostle Joshua Selman’s Teaching on relationship and marriage.

Dear Sisters, 4 Things a man must have before you marry him.

1.God fearing.

Reverence to God.
Not neccesarily a pastor,but just God fearing.
He must be a man who submit to the word of God as the final authority in ALL matters.

2.He must Submit to the earthly authority.

Especially a pastor. A man who does not have an authority over him is DANGEROUS, please daughter run away.
Never marry a man who does not have a pastor, a mentor, a spiritual authority, an elderly person.
¶There must be a personality he has covenanted to listen to. (Otherwise who will defend you when things go wrong?)
¶No matter how wrong a man or a woman may be,if there is someone he can listen to, you are still safe.
¶Sister, if you tell him let’s go and see the pastor and he refuses, run away from him. That’s how when he will slap you and you tell him let’s take this to the pastor he will refuse.
¶The man must clearly show you a father/mother figure over him.
¶ The only reason a man can refuse to be under authority is when he is planning to be unfaithful.

The purpose of submitting to earthly authority is ;

i. For mentorship.
ii. For Building
ii. For Correction.

3.He must have passion for you.

Passion is an adjective that qualifies the degree/extent of love.Any man who does not have passion for you will be UNFAITHFUL.
It is statistically confirmed that over 75-80% of men even in Christian families, married men within the first five years of their Marriage have been unfaithful to their wives. Not because they are bad, it’s passion.
A man who has passion for you is the one of course who knows that other ladies are beautiful as well but you are his wife.

Prov.31.29 “Many women have done wonderful things, but you’ve outclassed them all!” (MSB)

Any man who can’t acknowledge this is dangerous already.
Not that a beautiful lady passes by and even the wife herself is afraid because she knows the kind of man she is married to. Vulnerability!

There are other wicked ladies out there who are not just going to leave your man just because he is married. They are not afraid of a ring, if you like add two rings. They will still hunt down your man.
So we need to be aware that battles continue even when we Marry.

When he has passion for you, he will survive. If he doesn’t have passion for you, he will succumb.
Thus passion and love for you is very important. If you can’t trace passion, please sister don’t marry him.

Brothers, it is very ok to see a lady and just be fond of her. The mystery of attraction is when you find a lady or a person or an object demonstrating many things you perceive to represent value to you.
So if beauty represents value to man,even a Christian brother, it is impossible to see a pretty girl and pretend that he is spiritual. It is only that he has self control.

Therefore Brothers listen, whenever you see that you are attracted to a lady, it is not enough reason to go and ask them out. That’s lack of self control.

4.Never marry a man who is irresponsible.

To be responsible means to be aware of the cost dimension of life. There must be a demonstration of responsibility.
There are many brothers who are irresponsible, christian brothers inclusive, tongue talking christian brothers!
It is to know that anything that must be done,must be done by someone. There must be people who do it.
The Bible says that;
“For every house is builded by some man; but he that built all things is God.”
— Hebrews 3:4 (KJV)
Yes, everything that needs building needs a builder! This builder is me and you! Don’t sit down and be lazy.
An irresponsible person says, “They have not done it.”
A responsible person says, “Can we do it?”
Irresponsibility produces laziness.
What causes irresponsibility.

i.Being overpampered

overpampered does not neccesarily mean that you come from a rich family, a poor family can still overpamper you.

Example
A man is 18 years old and the moment he is washing clothes, you say, “Is there not a house help,wash for him, because we have a washing machine in our house.”

A young man who is supposed to start learning to be responsible, he goes out and by 4 o’clock, you are ringing his phone, “Return home.” It looks like you are trying to be disciplinary but there is an age range where he needs to be home and there is an age range where that guy is supposed to be submissive! Maybe he is in church as a choir director, and you are now calling a mature boy of 19 years, “where are you, come home.” So the guy is now 25 years and he stays home.

He married his wife and he stays home just like mumie said. Obedient child! Nobody goes out to get food again because he has been trained, “come home.”

They always expect to be recepients not contributors, it’s not their fault. It’s as a poor upbringing that could not breed responsibility.
They are born again, love God, but anything that discomforts then a little, they don’t want it.

Remember this, irresponsibility produces laziness.

ii. Waiting for everything to be done for you”

This is the second thing that causes irresponsibility.
Things will not always be done for you.
It is your duty to make things happen for yourself.
Praying alone won’t help if responsibility factor is not introduced in the equation.
Everyone must work and Apostle Paul makes it clear.

In the text below,
“For even when we were with you, this we commanded you, if any would not work, neither should he eat.”
— 2 Thessalonians 3:10 (KJV)

This was meant to discourage laziness and irresponsibility by all means. He highlights the severity of the punishment that must accompany those that tend to be irresponsible. This means that eating and work go hand in hand, hunger and laziness are thus also inseparable.
That’s how God has designed it.
Sisters, if he is not responsible, don’t marry him.
For ladies who will come across this

If you successfully ignore it, mark this date and write my name under it! You will surely regret. It doesn’t matter how romantic you think you are, how intelligent you think you are, if you ignore any of those, you must cry some day!

That’s is pure truth. It shall be better to her who didn’t read it.
The scripture must be the basis of everything in a Christian Life.

Jas.4.17 So any person who knows what is right to do but does not do it, to him it is sin. (AMP)
For men, let’s meet tommorow at this WhatsApp Pulpit.

Also see 6 things that a lady must have before you marry her under this publication.

what’s your take on this? Share your opinions

Shalom!

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